And so it is...

I'm starting this blog in hopes of one day, our baby will be able to look back on it (my husband's idea) and see how much we wanted him/her and how much we had to fight to get them.


Almost 6 years ago, I gave birth to a precious baby boy, Ethan. And almost 2 and a half years ago, I became a stepmother to a beautiful young lady, Lexie. Our children, now ages 8 and 5, fill us with such happiness but we feel like there is something (or someone) TINY missing and that's what this blog is about.


Justin and I have been together for almost 4 and a half years. We knew shortly after we met and became serious about spending the rest of our lives together, that we wanted to have a baby. So after getting married in April of 2009 and moving into our house in June of 2009, we immediately started trying. Well, it's now September of 2011 and there is still no baby crying in the middle of the night or dirty diapers to change. I never thought it would take this long...never.


After spending a lot of hours at doctor's offices, I've been diagnosed with a couple of different "conditions". I'm hypothyroid, I have PCOS and I'm insulin resistant. Those three things combined seem to cause a lot of problems, especially infertility. 


I've been on several medications throughout the process so far but still feel like I'm at the beginnings of all of this because in 4 weeks, when we go back to the RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist), it seems like we have a lot of decisions to make. I'm not sure of all of those decisions yet because we haven't gotten there.


I'm starting my third cycle with Clomid (used to stimulate ovulation when the ovaries can produce a follicle but hormonal stimulation is deficient) tomorrow. I'm up to 3 pills a day which is the highest my RE will go. So I'm praying it does something this time around.


It gets so discouraging. Where it goes from here, I have no idea. Am I scared at all? Yes. Am I nervous that I will never have another baby? Absolutely. But I do know that my husband and I will work together until we get the outcome we want.


Here's hoping it's sooner, rather than later!